Nicola Roberts is releasing ‘Yo-Yo’ as the third single from her album Cinderella’s Eyes, and just like we did for ‘Beat Of My Drum’ we’ve broken it all down for you through a series of screencaps and added some ~funny captions. Enjoy!
The video opens with a man doing some very nifty yo-yo tricks. The only yo-yo trick we know is “walk the dog”.
Nicola is trying on different outfits for us to judge, we presume. 8/10.
Nice twirl. 5/10.
How very princess-like. 9/10.
“I’m not wearing these shoes they make me cankley.”
Nicola applies some make up. If this was a Britney video, there would be some serious product placement going on right now. Missed opportunity to plug Dainty Doll here.
“Does my bum look big in this?”
“I’m not wearing these shoes either - they give me blisters!”
“Oh fuck, I’ve thrown one of those parties where everyone just hangs out in the kitchen.”
Then we see a couple walking down a street in the dark. They look cute together. Aww.
The guy doing nifty tricks makes the yo-yo jump off its own string. Amazing.
Wait, the guy in the couple from earlier is actually Nicola’s man? We don’t like where this is heading…
HAHAHAHAHAHA. This guy.
“Argh! Why are you all up in my business when I’m trying to dance to camera?”
“Seriously, if you throw me off my groove one more time, I’ll have your balls on toast.”
Behind Nicola’s back, her boyfriend and the girl who we’re now gonna call SLAGFACE are making bedroom eyes at each other. Sads :(
Weird prison shower moment.
These two girls on the left are the best “friends of popstar in a music video” since Accordion Player and Dolphin Hand Girl from Rebecca Black’s ‘Friday’ video.
Nicola gives some fantastic “singing through a mouthful of shower water” face. What a trooper.
“Listen, I’m well in love with you and stuff. Like that Natasha Bedingfield song. But do you fancy me back though? I don’t know if you fancy me back…”
Nicola walks in on her boyfriend and SLAGFACE pashing outside her flat.
Nicola does some crouch down, head-in-hands crying :(
Nicola and her boyfriend have an argument in the kitchen. It looks like he’s bought her some flowers. Probably from a petrol station forecourt. “These smell like FUEL!”
“TAKE THEM BACK YOU *censored* *censored* *censored* waste of space, pathetic *censored*…”
“…why don’t you just *censored* *censored* *censored* with a *censored* satsuma and then *censored* yourself in the EAR with a *censored* *censored* hair brush and have a *censored* plate to the face and all!”
“PS. YOUR MUM.”
Then Nicola does some crying in the shower. The End.
We love Nicola and we love this video. Shame about the dress she chose to wear in the end though…
